Absence is among the major sins
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A person commits backbiting when they mention another’s flaws in their absence, especially those that the victim dislikes, and particularly if the person is reserved, even if those flaws are real.
In the Holy Quran, God Almighty says regarding backbiting: “O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful.” (Surah Al-Hujurat, Verse 12). The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said in a noble Hadith: “Do you know what backbiting is?” They said: “Allah and His Messenger know best.” He said: “It is mentioning your brother in a manner that he dislikes.” It was asked: “What if what I say about my brother is true?” He replied: “If what you say about him is true, then you have backbitten him; if it is not true, then you have slandered him.”
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A sensible Muslim is expected to refrain from backbiting, because it is among the major sins. Among the types of backbiting, we mention the following:
- Ghibat through subtle criticism and mockery: Criticizing people’s reputations subtly is called “hamz,” while pointing out their flaws in their absence is called “lamz.” The worst form is describing them in their absence with attributes they dislike.
- Listening to backbiting: I believe that anyone who pays attention to backbiting merely to mock or express astonishment commits the same sin as the backbiter. A sensible Muslim elevates himself above listening to backbiting, does not pay attention to gossip, and leaves the place where it is being discussed.
- Mocking the absent person: A person mocks others when they make fun of them, turning their life and private affairs—especially if they are absent—into a topic of amusement with others.
- Inciting discord among people: A person backbites one or more absent individuals when they deliberately sow discord among them, usually for purely narcissistic reasons, particularly due to envy among peers or relatives.
- Showing joy at worldly misfortunes: The worst type of backbiting is showing joy at a misfortune or disaster that befalls a person, a family, or a community, not necessarily because they are enemies of the backbiter, but out of jealousy or feelings of inferiority toward them. This constitutes one of the major sins, as it also represents a form of objection to the decree of God Almighty. Whoever rejoices in the misfortunes of others will inevitably suffer similar misfortunes as a worldly punishment for their backbiting, even if delayed. And God knows best.
$ A Kuwaiti writer
