The Hopeless Romantic
Dialogues
In this article, the “romantic” is defined as someone who persistently prefers emotion and excessive imagination over rational (objective) thinking. He is despairing because he refuses to change his naive way of thinking, and because he repeatedly drowns himself in artificial sorrows; had he considered them logically, he would have realized he had no need for them.
Among the traits of the despairing romantic, we mention the following:
- Excessive moral idealism: He immerses himself in moral idealism despite the stark contradiction between what he believes to be “universal” values and principles, and the nature of the environment in which he lives. He is also despairing due to his continued exposure to psychological shocks, while simultaneously refusing to moderate his moral idealism.
- Superficial thinking: The despairing romantic is concerned with external appearances, valuing emotions and feelings more than facts and realities. He may even blame himself for the disasters inflicted upon him by others, rather than blaming or punishing those who deliberately harm him. In his view, life is overflowing with angelic people.
- Living on the surface of the past: The romantic lives in the past, with most of his thoughts revolving around false memories. While the wise live their present authentically, the despairing romantic clings to the superficial remnants of a past he does not remember accurately, yet he continues to idolize it.
- The romantic and emotional hypersensitivity: You will find him highly empathetic toward others, perhaps exhausting himself intellectually and emotionally in an attempt to alleviate their suffering, which their reckless behaviors have caused. He offers one-sided, excessive consolation. While he is psychologically and physically drained due to his emotional hypersensitivity, it is rare in many human environments in today’s turbulent world for those he empathizes with to reciprocate those feelings or stand by him when he needs only moral support.
- Weak psychological maturity: The prominent feature of the despairing romantic’s personality is the mismatch between his level of thinking and his actual age. He is often a man-child or a woman-child. Evidence of his psychological immaturity is his continued romanticism in a world that is dull, faded, and extremely harsh.
- The romantic and premature death: Due to his excessive emotional thinking, the continuous exhaustion of his mind and body, and the burden he places on them beyond their capacity, the romantic may develop heart diseases. His excessively emotional behaviors might even lead to premature death. God knows best.
A Kuwaiti writer
