When Gold Strikes Iron

I was struck by the saying: “The most painful blows are those that come from your own kind.” To clarify this proverb, it is said that when iron is struck with an iron hammer, the sound of the blow is loud and audible; but when gold is struck with an iron hammer, no such noise is heard. The reference here is not to gold and iron literally, but rather to the fact that pain and betrayal, when they come from a stranger, can be endured by a person. However, if a hurtful word, an insult, or a stab in the back comes from someone close—from family, a friend, or a trusted person—the pain is deeper and the wound more severe. The pain inflicted by a close one is not due to the blow itself, but because of who delivers it. Many people around us suffer from old, deeply rooted pain in their hearts, originating from those closest to them, most attached, and nearest. They endure this torment because they are unable to free themselves from this pain; the moment a memory of it brushes against the edges of their recollection, it resurfaces. A stranger’s injury, insult, or mistake is minor, because it is often folded away in the moment—either by an immediate response to the insult or by transcending it and rising above it. But the insult from those closest to us clings to our flesh and does not heal with time; because we do not try to treat it or even approach it, given the intensity of the pain. A human being is a mass of emotions and feelings, affected by external stimuli, whether sadness or joy. And the closer the source of the stimulus is to us, the more intense and difficult the pain becomes, and vice versa. This is human nature, and we have no choice but to rise above whatever troubles and saddens us, elevating ourselves far above it, so as to avoid any conflict that would yield nothing but more pain... and pain. Iqbal Al-Ahmad